Sunday, March 22, 2009

The other day I was standing in front of a Barnes & Noble bookstore waiting for it to open. I wanted to get there early, because I wanted to do some work on my laptop. Barnes & Noble is set up to accomodate the worker who doesn't have an office and finds being at home far too distracting. That would be me. You can actually sit in their cafe all day long if you want to. And I wanted to. There is only one glitch, however...eventually you're gonna need to charge your battery. In this particular store, there are only two outlets inside the cafe area and those tables that are in close proximity to the electrical outlets are obviously the creme de la creme. I already had my work cut out for me; there was a guy who also arrived with his laptop in tow...I knew he knew the layout of the cafe just as well as I did. We both knew where the prime plugs were. It was definitely going to be a race to the death. Or, in this case, to the plug.

As I was waiting for the store to open, standing next to the 10 foot sign displaying the hours of the store: "Barnes & Noble open every day from 9AM to 11pm," a car pulls up right in front of the store, right in front of me, and right in front of the sign. Did I mention the sign was about 10 feet high with the words, "BARNES & NOBLE OPEN EVERY DAY FROM 9AM TO 11PM. Yeah, I did mention that. So the woman in the car, rolls down the passenger door window, leans over , looks past me, looks directly at the sign and says, "Excuse me?" I turned. "Yes?" I asked. "Do you know what time the store opens?" I looked at her. I looked at the sign. I looked at the man with the laptop. He winked at me. I smiled and turned back to the woman in the car. What I really wanted to say was, "Are you blind? Are you kidding me? Why do you want to go into a bookstore if you can't read?!"

Of course, I didn't say any of those things. I simply answered "9:00." "Oh," she said. "Do you know what time it is now?" I glanced down at my watch. "Five to nine," I said. She was really starting to get on my nerves. Without so much as a thank you or a nod or anything, she tore out of that parking lot as if she was the getaway car in a bank robbery. I turned to look at my fellow laptop user, but he was watching the manager unlock the door to the store. Apparently, my watch was 5 minutes slow. It was showtime.

Laptop guy proved to be a gentleman, allowing me entry into the store before him. I reached the prime table next to the plug. He sat at a table directly next to me so his plug would reach the outlet as well. I got the bigger table, but we were both happy.